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Monday, July 15, 2013

Justin Bieber's Guide To Life

justin bieber quotes

If Justin Bieber seems a bit unhinged lately, maybe you're just a hater confused admirer. Sure, he peed in public while insulting a former president and dubbed Anne Frank an anachronistic Belieber, but are you 19 years old with five No. 1 albums? Do you have over 41 million followers on Twitter or enough panache to rock a bowl cut?

Probably not, pal, but you better Belieb that Justin does. So, maybe it's time to start paying attention. There's a lot of wisdom in that adorably petit Canadian body, and maybe you could just learn from it. Here, to quell the ignorance, Justin Bieber's guide to life:

On politics...

“I’m not sure about the parties. But whatever they have in Korea, that’s bad.”

On education...

“It’s kind of hard to balance school and work sometimes. But sometimes, like, if I’m going to the White House and I’m in there doing a tour and stuff, that’s like school.”

On cheese...
“Singers aren’t supposed to have dairy before a show, but we all know I’m a rule breaker.”
On candy...
“I also try to read all of my fan mail. A lot of them send me candy, which I’m not allowed to eat ’cause my mom says it might be poisonous.”
On health...
“Whenever I’m sick, my doctor jokes that I have Bieber Fever.”
On minorities...
“I’m actually part Indian. I think Inuit or something? I’m enough percent that in Canada I can get free gas.”
On abortion...
“I really don’t believe in abortion. It’s like killing a baby.”
On Kim Kardashian...
“I think she’s cute. And, no, she’s not too old for me. Above 40 is a little too old for me."
On hair loss...
"I mean, there are things to prevent that nowadays, like Propecia. I don't know why [Prince William] doesn't just get those things, those products. You just take Propecia and your hair grows back. Have you not got it over here?"
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